Friends: Me, Kathy, Gayla and Merrilee


San Antonio Marathon: Sisters Sally,Penny and Me


Brendon's Christmas Party at Beech Elementary

Santa's Unexpected Christmas Present and Celebrity Spotting

Happy holiday everyone.

We woke up this morning to find Santa left a little unexpected animal in our tree. Hanging on for dear life to the limb was a squirrel! The family joined in got pursuit to chase it out the door! It was hilarious watching Ryan with his tennis racket and Larry with the broom run around the den. It escaped past Brendon into the dining room up the stairs followed by the dog. Down the stairs it came while I jumped on the chair. Temporarily we lost the poor creature. Andrew took control of the dog while we searched the living room. After looking under the furniture he emerged from the couch. Ryan in his excitement beat it over its head. Andrew threw a sheet over it and Larry grabbed it realizing it was still alive. He carried it off and hopefully it scampered away. And we got it all on video, may be featured on America's Funniest Video...

We also had a celebrity spotting at the cathedral catholic church. Sitting two rows ahead of us was Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman. I heard very little of the sermon as I was distracted trying not to stare. I was obsessed trying to figure out who the 4 kids in the pew belonged to. I think the baby was theirs but not sure of the rest. I will report they didn't last the entire service, disappeared before communion...

Here's wishing you a memorable holiday!

Blessings

To Run or Not to Run

I have noticed with the upcoming holidays, shorter days, colder weather, and post marathon I have not had the same excitement about running. I have just listed all the reasons I will roll around in my head before a run. I know this mood will not last, and I have to adopt the attitude: Do it Anyway. I have found during the run, I get a sense of charity, I reconnect with my body, the glorious gift God has given me, I give praise, offer petitions and am ALWAYS glad I shoved myself out of the bed. I have developed a new appreciation for the treadmill. This has allowed me to concentrate on the speed. I continue to sign up for races. I have found I do better with a goal. It keeps me focused when the desire to abstain hits.

I completed the Frostbite 5K at the YMCA in Sumner County this past weekend. I achieve a personal best and got 1st place in my age group. The competition was with myself. To run faster, to see if the speed training was working and to motivate me to continue. I was thinking about my accomplishment as I ran 7 miles this morning. I pushed myself to run faster and longer. It was exhilarating to challenge my body and my mind in this way.

Find something that will challenge you. Set a goal and a plan for reaching that goal. The focus will keep you motivated when the urge to quit becomes strong and what came easy is not a challenge. This is the true test of God's service. When the going gets tough, the tough get going. The rewards are worth it.

In Sickness and Health

In sickness and in health... for those of you who are married you remember well these vows. Recently I was able to apply the same vows to my running. I was in Chicago, the cold weather really got to me and I developed a head cold (that has moved into my chest as we speak). The urge to not run was strong. But I knew I needed the physical release and meditative connection with God so I headed to the workout room. (I was not crazy enough to venture into the cold Chicago winds though I was saddened by not experiencing the city in this way). I was comforted by the fact I was in post marathon mode and only committed to running 5 miles.

It was a good thing I only had 5 miles to run. To say it was difficult was an understatement. It was downright painful. I was sweating in the first 5 minutes, I felt out of breath and my body was protesting. I kept on dedicated to finishing in much the same fashion I was in the marathon, to run through the pain and discomfort, to connect with my breath, shallow though it was.

I finished and once again was impressed by the completion of a difficult task. It is during these times when running is difficult I feel more connected to my God. It truly is Him that keeps me going because I knew by myself I would have collapsed 1 mile in.

Finishing the San Antonio Marathon

Yea... I finished the San Antonio Marathon. The finish is always a celebration! It has been five years since my last full marathon (26.2 miles). The preparation and completion of this marathon was a different process for me. Though I have always used spiritual meditation to connect with God, I made it more intentional and I expanded my practice.

During the marathon there were times of ease, when I was connected to the crowd, my breath, and my body. I enjoyed these times. I made it a point to give high fives to the children in the audience, wave and smile. Marathon running often represents the overcoming of obstacles with the race a symbol of the challenges one is experiencing. I talked to a man pushing his friend who was in a wheelchair. We made a connection of sharing a similar experience: the marathon itself and having a loved one with a disability. It was a moment of connection and support for each of us. There were many running for a charity and I would acknowledge some as I passed by, offering encouragement or asking a question. There were military persons along the way and I thanked them for their service. Each person had their own story and I would often think about their life and try to get a picture of their reason for completing this distance. Often the reason was apparent by their physical appearance (the lady I assumed had cancer as she had no hair or the man with an artificial leg) but often their story was hidden from my view. I would imagine and try to get some clues, then I would bless them and move on.

During the periods of challenge, pain and discomfort, I would practice mindfulness. I would briefly acknowledge my pain, then offer it as a sacrificial practice for those that are suffering or for those that can't run. I prayed for Brendon, my friend in the hospital, a friend with cancer, the alcoholic and the troubled marriages. I prayed for Ryan, Andrew, those who have lost loved ones, my husband, my finances, and the government. Through long uninterrupted periods of time I thought of others in an effort to manage my own discomfort. Each time a discomfort or pain was too much I was propelled by the connection with the suffering of others. Returning to the breath was my reconnection with God and offering for others. This practice moved me forward one step at a time.

It was a beautiful day, cool enough in the morning for gloves and long sleeves but as I continued forward on the path the warmth of the sun quickly brought me to a more comfortable temperature. There was a slight wind at times especially the last half of the race. There were times of challenge in maneuvering through the vast amounts of people on the course. As we moved out of the city into the mission district of San Antonio for the second half of the race the road became clearer and the silence more prominent. I found this a relief and had more opportunity to practice meditation as I ran through discomfort and pain. I was most connected in my suffering during miles 17-20 and again at miles 20-22. I used the practice of offering my suffering as a sacrifice for the suffering of others.

Through perseverance I made it toward the end, sprinting the last .2 miles to cross the finish. I was sore, it was hard, but I was filled with contentment and confidence. I could hear the voice of God say: "Well done, good and faithful servant."

On the Downslide

As the San Antonio marathon approaches, Sunday Nov. 16, my training has decreasesd over the past two weeks. Today will be my last long run, 6 miles. Next weeks run is only 30 minutes. Then it's the full marathon. As the days have gotten shorter and fall is in full swing it has been more difficult these past weeks to be energized to run. I find myself wanting to stay in bed and not face the cool of the morning. I have also found myself at the YMCA track more often, not wanting to face the outside world. This reflects my current mood, a little gloomy, lazy, and depressed. I seek the comfort of home, the warmth of the heat, the mindlessness of watching TV. I don't want to face action and living life on life's terms. But God continues to call me to do what I often find myself not wanting to do. He nudges me out of bed on a cool Saturday morning like today and tells me it's time to run, time to connect with him in meditation as I breath through the miles and put one foot in front of the other. It is not complicated, it is simple. As you wake up this morning, take some time to enjoy the beauty of this Saturday, honoring God and family with intention, breathing in the gift of life, and following the simple path.

Gratitude is Intentional

I am so excited I now have one follower on my blog! I love to see your comments and that somehow my story touches you. Hopefully it inspires you to develop your own story. That is the only way we can learn, I think, is by sharing our stories!

Today I set out for a short 50 minute run. The air was cool and the sun was bright. I decided to head to Moss Wright Park as I'm getting a little tired of my other courses. I couldn't wake Andrew to go with me, he stayed up too late last night.

Half way into my run, I realized that I have been doing a lot of talking to God, making requests, listing my demands, and what I needed with very little thought to all the blessings I have already been given: the sun shining brightly, the beautiful park, time to run this morning, my special moms who came to my house last night to fellowship, etc. I began to realize that He already knows what I need and I am already receiving all I need. I switched gears and began to run with gratitude. I began to list all the things I was grateful for on this beautiful morning. With each thing I said a memorized prayer. I had to really concentrate on what I was doing because my mind kept going to my list of requests again, patience, strength, success, etc. It is so easy to slip into self centered prayer. Staying in gratitude takes discipline and concentration. It is a form of meditation that takes lots of practice. Running the distances I do gives me ample time to practice. Really, you would think after logging in the miles which number in the thousands right now, I would be better at gratitude, it would come easier and be more natural. But it is still something I have to do with intention. I think God is happy with the fact that I continue to try.

"I am focusing my eye on the prize which lies before me" Put one foot, or if you're in a wheelchair, roll one wheel in front of the other, with each move forward focusing on gratitude letting each intention bring you into God's presence.

Happy meditation!

I'm back... after taking 13 days off I am back on my marathon training schedule. With 21 days left to the San Antonio marathon, this is the last long run, 20 miles! Why would anyone want to take on the challenge of running a 26.2 mile marathon? For me it's a way to be a little less crazy. Life is difficult, emotional and frustrating. Running gives me perspective, I put myself through a vigorous schedule toward a goal. Three reasons keep me running, through difficulties, aches, and busy schedules.

1. It is my spiritual connection: there is something about running that connects me to God. We talk, OK mostly I talk, but through the exertion of my body I get answers - how to improve my relationships, sorting through a conflict and determining my part - solutions to career related problems - and overcoming writers block, to name just a few. I get to go places on the road a car can't get into and I love paying attention to the noises, the color, the scenery God has put in my path which in day to day life I tend to ignore.

2. Running is my way to release emotions that could easily overcome me: anger, fear, depression, and sadness. There is something about physical exertion and doing something in which you can focus your physical self on that allows the thinking and emotions to get right sized and I can go about the things that happen in my day.

3. Running is a family event for me. I have three boys and finding something physical to do with them is sometimes difficult. My oldest son and I have run two half marathons and several 5K races together. When your children enter into adulthood and go away to college, it is sometimes difficult to make connections. Running keeps us connected. My middle son doesn't like running as much right now but he has completed several 5K races with me, and if he is not in the race with me he is cheering and taking pictures. I also know he has respect for my physical ability since running is harder for him right now. I now also run with my youngest son , pushing him in his stroller. It is my way of teaching him that just because he has a disability doesn't mean he has to be limited. Even my husband is involved: driving us to the races, paying the entry fees, taking video and pictures and having water at the finish line!

These things keep me running: God, stability and family. What more can a person ask from life! And... there's nothing like crossing a finish line, and one final reward... the medal!

18 Miles of Difficulty

It has been two days since my 18 mile long run in preparation for the November San Antonio marathon. It's taken me two days to get over the painful experience of body, mind and spirit.

As with any long run, and even the shorter runs, I usually participate in a back and forth dialogue in my mind. I planned to begin at 6:00 am and end a little after 9:00am. I don't know if anyone else engages in self talk but I do it all the time. I'm told it is healthy. As usual when I'm facing such a long stretch of running, I have to do a lot of self talk. "Yes you need to do this." "No you can't wait or postpone because your schedule is too busy this week." You'll feel better when it's done." "You've done this before and you can do it again!" Usually my self talk begins in anticipation of the run, days before. My mind plays a kind of ping pong ball game, back and forth from talking myself into : "Yes, let's go, you can do it!" to talking myself out of: "Oh --- there's no way!" Occasionally I will engage and follow the negative, and I always regret it. Eventually, however, the "JUST DO IT" thought will prevail and overcome any obstacles my mind perceives

The weather was cool and the sky had a pink glow in the horizon. I savored it's sight as I knew it would quickly be gone as I changed directions and the day emerged. I committed to run the neighborhood for the first three or four miles. This proved to be a good thing. From the beginning my stomach started it's protests. I stopped three times at the house. The ping pong game started back in my head. I continue to wonder if taking on this distance, on this day was worth the discomfort of a protesting stomach. I returned to the thought: "You have no other time in your busy schedule this week to run!" and recognized a new thought: "Whose to say another day will be any different!"

The weather continued to be a blessing, I have learned to take any positive thought I can get. It was sunny, clear and with a coolness I look forward to on a fall day. I continued to put miles behind me as I took one step at a time. I wish I could say the run got easier, but it didn't. It was a constant effort to remain in the present. I continued to follow my prayer mantra. I practiced being mindful of the breath. I even tried the body awareness technique discussed in Roger Joslin's book. I began at my feet, recognizing their movement and feel. I got as far as my quadriceps when I lost interest, the effort to think about my body one part at a time proved to be too difficult. I abandoned the task.

I remembered that sometimes running is painful, uncomfortable, and the thoughts of giving up can consume each step. This is similar to the most recent events of my life off the road. I am working to create a vocation, a new career that will honor all of my experiences and bring awareness to others. I have recently had thoughts of giving up the pursuit, wondering if what I was doing was worth it. I have recently had thoughts of giving up the pursuit, wondering if what i was doing was worth it, similar to the thought while embarking on this run. I have had to talk myself out of the negative and fear filled spaces that my mind wants to occupy. Perseverance, and continuing on despite discomfort became the lesson of the run.

I never got to enjoy this running experience, it was too uncomfortable. I never settled into a peaceful rhythm. I continued the practice of mindful breathing, which got me through and I focused on staying in the present, choosing to look at the road directly in front of me and the strike of my foot on the pavement. I knew based on past experience eventually the run would end and I would be able to rest.

What started out to be a three hour run actually took almost four hours. As in life when I am having doubts, I had to rest more, take more breaks, refocus my mind and prepare my body. Each time I stopped I refocused my thoughts and mustered up additional strength to continue on the path. Eventually the run did end, I took pride in the fact I allowed my healthy mind, the one that tells me to continue on despite fear, discomfort and even pain to dominate and propel me toward the end. I ended my run with a steep uphill climb, a symbol of one final trial, exactly what I needed to bring this experience to completion. I ended much as I began in discomfort and duress. BUT, it was exactly what I needed and when I was done I had one more successful experience of persevering toward the end despite the discomfort, pain and fear.

NEW Lessons from Blind Running

Yesterday I took off on a 50 minute run around the neighborhood. It began as one of those runs you just know from the beginning is going to be difficult. It was a little too warm, the sun was strong, and it was windy, which made my lips feel dry and my mouth feel thirsty. This was part of my scheduled training and I knew I wouldn't be able to make this run up at any other time in the week so off I went.

I was coming to the last 15 minutes, almost home, with one last steady, uphill climb. The feeling of fatigue, dryness and warmth had increased and I was really ready to have this run behind me. To make matters worse I was having difficulty focusing my mind on staying spiritually connected. I decided to rely on my blind running meditation to hopefully get me to the end. I do this with the intention to focusing on the other senses, which are often neglected because of my dependence on visual stimulus.

I have been working on perfecting a method of running with my eyes closed by saying a ritual prayer. I will say 24 words of the prayer with my eyes closed then open my eyes and say the remaining 17 words. I have worked up to the 24 words. I have realized through this practice I can focus on the angle of the sun, the feel of the road as my foot strikes, and the sounds around me. I was reflecting on faith and thought the lesson was to close my eyes while God said, "Trust Me" implying he would not allow me to fall off the path while my eyes were closed. Unlike other times when I have done blind running, it was a real effort, which I perceived as a lack of faith. So I kept up the blind running practice willing my senses to take over, the fear of falling to disappear, all while wrestling with fatigue, thirst, and heat! There was a nudging that I thought was telling me blind running was not working! I viewed this as lack of faith and prayed more diligently for God to increase my faith. My eyes were closed, I was willing my mind to concentrate, I felt the sun on the right side of my face, I had gotten 18 words into my prayer when OOPS! Off the road I fell into the gravel on my hands and knees, the symbol of prayer (interesting that I would land this way). It was so fast, and in that moment I realized I was being ridiculous. I started to laugh. You can't will faith by testing it, thinking what you are doing is Gods will. I realized I was not paying attention at all to what my intuition, my God voice was telling me. He wasn't trying to test my faith by asking me to continue to keep my eyes closed for the 24 words, God doesn't work that way. I had become so distracted by getting to the end of those 24 words that I really wasn't listening to God at all, but instead to my own stubborn ego. What God was really saying, (yelling actually) was: "OPEN YOUR EYES!" It was that simple, that easy, nothing complicated, or thought provoking, but simply open your eyes.

In that moment I realized it was not just about the praying (which I did with my eyes closed), it was about realizing in the prayer what God was telling me to do, the action that follows the prayer, and then taking that action. "OPEN YOUR EYES, take the next action, and I will be with you." This is what faith is about

Running in Community

There are times when running is a solo event, one person, one race, one set of shoes, one breath pattern. I love running alone, just me, my shoes and an open road. There is another type of running that is worthy of exploration, a type of run that will sharpen your focus, test your fitness, and expand your joy. Recently I have discovered the joys of running with a partner. In June of this year I began running with my nine year old son Brendon who has Muscular Dystrophy. He saw me complete many races and wanted to race too! So I began including him. Because he uses a wheelchair I had to get special equipment. Together, with me pushing, we ran up hills (many, many hills), through neighborhoods, at the beach, and away from dogs. The Christie Cookie 5K at the Green Hills YMCA on September 20, 2008 marked the finish of our third race (2 5K's and 1 half marathon). Each race has taken on it's own theme. This race was about community.

I often have difficulty with the 5K race. The crowds, short distance, and unfamiliar trails tend to get in the way of my ever developing a rhythm. I usually don't feel comfortable or have a good pace going until after the first two miles. I get distracted trying to keep up with the other runners. This race was no different. In addition I had to make sure I kept out of the way of other runners with the stroller, found enough open space, and didn't clip any heals. Every step seemed to be an effort. I keep entering these races because:
1. There are plenty of them.
2. I get race practice for my upcoming marathon in November.
3. I get to be with other runners.
But the fourth reason is what motivated me to enter this race:
4. Another opportunity to share moments of joy with my son, to make racing possible for him!

When you run for someone else, it is more than an individual achievement and other racers recognize this. This race was a community event. We were cautious in our passing, and gave plenty of warning when we were coming upon someone. We had to yell out warning and the runners were receptive to us speeding by. We are careful to not intrude on another persons race by running into their heals or bumping up against their sides. In this race there was a long up hill somewhere into mile two. A lady with a grey shirt and red hat named Maria approached us, "I have experience stroller running," she said. "Would you like some help?" "Yes!" "Thank you," I replied. The hill looked exhausting, long and steep! Maria chatted a few minutes with Brendon and I told her a little about our racing together. I was careful to be aware of her race experience and asked if she was OK. I didn't want to take advantage of her generosity. She said she was OK and kept on pushing. I was grateful for the respite and the hill was falling away. With just a little more of the hill to go up,I took over and continued on with Brendon, both of us thanking her for her generosity.

I continued to struggle with my thoughts. Each breath was labored and each step an act of will to finish. Knowing I was partners with Brendon and he needed me to keep going so he could finish gave me the will to persevere. Another intuitive runner, with a yellow shirt, named Claire offered her assistance. With her hands on the stroller and mine at my sides we continued on in partnership, with Brendon finishing as our goal. This brief respite gave me just enough strength to continue. We thanked her for her help and I took over the stroller.

I felt a new sense of energy burst forward. My speed quickened as I faced the final 500 yards. Brendon always loves to go fast and he noticed the quickened pace. Without my two race helpers I am not sure I would have had this final speed. Brendon began his cheers toward the finish. The sprint toward the end is always his favorite part and I was grateful to have had the energy to make it a fast one.

I am grateful for this new found community of runners, the compassionate, thoughtful, attentive, selfless and generous ones, who put their own goals aside to help a running pair reach the same finish line. This sense of community running is not found in the solo experience. These two ladies affirmed my belief that the world is a safe place for my son and there are those who will accept his disability and lend a hand if needed. Thank you to Maria and Claire for being present to the needs of others. I challenge the rest of you runners to shake up the solo experience, become a member of the community of runners, run for someone else, offer a hand, shout out a word of encouragement. There is immense joy to be had in being a member of a community of runners with a shared goal to finish, no matter what they have to do to make that possible for all that enter.

The Struggle to Finish

There are times when I run that it is easy to remain in God's presence, the time floats by without effort. I have come to see these times as gifts. They don't come often and I treasure them. No matter what type of meditation and prayer you practice, whether it is silent meditation or running meditation like myself you will have those times when time is not an issue and the meditation is free and easy.

Yesterday my 16 mile run was not this way. I could feel time, I could feel my knees getting sore and my feet aching. It was a battle to finish. Thoughts kept creeping into my head. I have learned through the practice of spiritual running that you acknowledge the thoughts and let them go. I would focus on my feet hitting the ground, my surroundings, my breath. I would practice one of the scripture passages I have memorized as a mantra. This would bring me consciously into the presence of God once again. I had to do this over and over as my mind kept struggling to go to the challenges I am facing in my life right in the moment.


When I face a challenge I am aware that it is so difficult to turn it over to God and trust that he only has good things planned for my life. And it is even more difficult to believe that all is well in these moments. I have come to believe in running mediation that the run that is a struggle is the most beneficial on the spiritual journey. Because it is a struggle and this is the one we most often engage in on our life's journey, I am also aware this is the reason most people give up on the run, or any exercise. When the going gets tough we have a natural tendency to give up, say I quit, and return to our old habits and inefficiencies. These inefficiencies may not produce the outcome we desire and they do not lead to the spiritual path but they are comfortable and familiar, like an old running shoe.

An old running shoe must be discarded when it is no longer useful. The cushioning breaks down, it gets worn and begins to give us problems. Old patterns of thought, old ways, ineffective methods must be discarded to make room for the new, and the spiritual. Don't be afraid, keep running on the path, keep reflecting and acknowledging the old and letting it go. Know that for all of us on the spiritual path the difficult run, the one you are not sure you will make it through, is the one that is most effective, as it is what happens when we seek God's will in our lives. So keep running, keep persisting, keep grounded in the movement and come to enjoy the spiritual path.

"For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you, and never to harm you."

Blessings and keep on the spiritual running path.

Complete Your Ideas

Yesterday I set out on a 60 minute run. I am now running toward a new goal, a new finish line. In November I will run the San Antonio marathon, as I have not run a full marathon since Brendon was 2 years old. I have come to enjoy running again and more than that it has become another path toward God and coming to know myself. Through running I have not only gotten in better shape, but I have been able to come to a clearer path toward God. Notice I said clearer, this implies that the path is not always clear.


Yesterday as I set out it was 5:30, it was dark. Now that my schedule has changed as a result of not having a traditional job, I no longer set out to go downtown, usually arriving by 6:00 to run around downtown and the Vanderbilt area. I miss those runs. Since I have established an early morning routine with running I figured I better continue it, I am following through on my plan. I was aware of my surroundings in a new way and ran in my familiar neighborhood until the light began to shine on a new day.

I began to think of incomplete ideas and plans, follow through, and immediately recognized this as an area I must pay attention to. This thought was sparked by watching a show that I find hilarious, "The New Adventures of Old Christine" with Julia Louise Dryfis. I have always loved her comedy as it connects to real, crazy, usually not talked about but often thought about, part of myself. Yesterday it was about starting plans and never finishing. I began thinking as I was running about all the great ideas, thoughts, and plans I have managed to bring to completion and those that have fallen by the waste side. Some of the thoughts I have been able to put into practice, this blog for one. It came to me one day as a way to chronicle my journey toward a life path and a spiritual journey. It has motivated me to keep in touch, I have come to depend on it as a way to deepen my relationships with others.

How many times do we in our own life have ideas, make plans, even go so far as sign up, and buy the equipment and then don't follow through. Exercise may be one of those activities. Of course I am not staying that all ideas are meant to be completed and require action on our part. Some thoughts are better left unsaid, undone and incomplete. It is the discernment of those things that I believe often keeps people from, as the Nike saying goes, "Just Doing It". It is our fear of our own failure, or even our fear of our success that prevents people from taking action. Sometimes things just don't turn out as we had expected and the natural response is to believe we were some how a failure. This is not the truth as I have come to experience. Some of my greatest failures have lead to some of the greatest successes. "For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and to never harm you." This is one of my running mantras taken from the bible. Sorry to the Baptists and others who can remember the exact book of the bible and the verse number, my Catholic mind, which has never been grounded in memorizing bible verses as a regular practice, just doesn't seem to remember that detail. But what I do remember are the things that speak to me through meditation and prayer or daily life experience and I make a commitment to memorizing them. Running is an excellent opportunity to do this as you have many miles and lots of time depending on the length of your run, to commit to memory those things that speak to you on the road.

In the verse, "For I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and to never harm you", I am reminded that I am not God. I cannot always know the reasons behind the actions I take, nor am I supposed to as then I am assuming the role of God. The important thing is to take the action. I always learn something. Either it is something I am to avoid or something I am to explore further. Taking action on the ideas that come to me allows me to deepen my relationship with my God, to help me to know myself in a deeper and more complete way.

So take off on your own journey whether it be running, waiting in the car pool lane, or sitting in church. Begin to write down the things that come to you in the daily routine of living your life. Meditate and pray on these things and take action. In this way you are fulfilling the role God intended for you.

The Extraordinary

So much of life is lived in the ordinary. I have been on a quest to help my family and Brendon in particular to live in the ordinary, and enjoy the all the ordinary moments. He goes to school with kids his age, vacation with the family, sporting events cheering for his brothers (and the Volunteers and Titans when we can), YMCA after school care, swimming, movies, etc. Often we have to think of ways to do things differently by accessing special seating, parking, equipment, restroom access, food Brendon can eat, hotel rooms that are big enough etc. to make these events as ordinary as possible. To make our life ordinary has often been frustrating, we don't get the opportunity to be anonymous. Even going to WalMart elicits glances, and comments. Every ordinary experience is an opportunity to educate and demonstrate to others, we are more alike than different. Sometimes this can be exhausting and frustrating for a mom. (Luckily I am at a stage in my life that it doesn't matter if I have make up on or not.) But I long ago accepted my role as educator and advocate because somewhere along the journey I realized this is what God intended me to be.

HOWEVER, sometimes you get the opportunity to do something EXTRAORDINARY. Those events and moments need to be celebrated and shared because those are the things that inspire and cause change. Running and completing the Virginia Beach 1/2 Marathon has been one of these EXTRAORDINARY experiences for me. From the moment Brendon got in the car and said, "This is going to be fun Mommy," I knew this was going to be an event to remember. We spent Friday afternoon reveling in the marathon exhibit experience. We got our race numbers (yes Brendon got his). We went on to meet Dick and Rick Hoyt. For the Hoyts marathon racing has become an ordinary experience. Most observers recognize what they do as extraordinary but from what I know of being a mom of a child with a disability, it's about the love a parent has for their child. a love that will often push a parent beyond their own limits to bring joy to their child's life. It's about creating your own story, what becomes ordinary to you. Their story is so powerful because it is an example of love and that is what inspires and encourages others such as Brendon and myself. We took pictures and got autographs. While at their booth we met another couple of racers who were also in wheelchairs. I recognized they were waiting and apologized for being in the way. They both smiled and said "patience". I knew exactly what they meant as I have observed the same patience in Brendon. We snapped a quick picture after a few minutes of conversation about the race.

Saturday we took it easy at the beach. My boys have always enjoyed the ordinary events of a beach vacation. Swimming, riding the waves, digging in the sand have entertained them for hours and this trip was no exception. What was helpful was the accessibility of the beaches. They had a boardwalk access to all the shops and wooden walkways leading to the sand, close to the water so the pushing in the stroller was minimal and easy. While Andrew surfed the waves, Brendon headed out on Ryan's shoulders to splash around. We headed home early to get rest for the big race.

4:30 AM Sunday, race day, everyone was in various stages of alertness. After dressing in our race ware, filling up water bottles, putting on the time chips and race numbers, gathering up other various essentials we headed out. We arrived in the dark, in plenty of time to participate in some prerace standing, chatting, and observing the excitement. We got to go directly to the front of the start line as we were starting with the wheelchair racers. I chatted with a mom helping her daughter who is on the wheelchair track team, this was her first 1/2 marathon. I talked to a young man and his mom. He had just completed the Country Music 1/2 Marathon in April. We made a connection as we discussed the hills. I expressed my admiration in his ability to do the up hill in his wheelchair. It was hard enough on two legs. The participants of TEAMHOYT began arriving in strollers and modified chairs. I talked with some of the pushers (a combinations of parents, family members and friends) and riders (those with disabilities), a few being sound asleep. We took pictures, and filmed video. Then it was time to kiss Andrew and Larry and move toward the start.

Everyone lined up at the start and in a flash there was movement as strollers and runners moved forward. All passed us but that was OK, slow and steady we were racing. Finishing was our goal.

Brendon's job was to film and keep up with the stop watch, and wave to the crowd and other runners. The crowds were amazing and encouraging. it was pleasant starting first out of the gate. The roads were clear and spacious. We knew we'd have about 15 minutes of uninterrupted running before the elite women would catch up with us. Ryan, Brendon and I enjoyed the crowds, the space to run, and the excitement. Brendon continued waving. We brought an American flag which he waved proudly.

The the pace cars came upon us and in a matter of seconds a pack of women zoomed by, so fast Brendon didn't have time to get his camera ready. Then they were gone. We enjoyed more open roads with continuous crowd support. About 10 minutes and another group of pace cars came upon us. This time Brendon was ready with the camera. he got the lead pack of men as they zoomed by. Just as quickly as they appeared they were gone! Then we knew our open road access would be challenged as the other runners would be coming up behind us. We kept running on as one by one racers began to pass us. We got lots of "Good Job, and Keep It Up's"! Brendon began shouting and waving encouragement back to all the runners. It was amazing, the cheers, the encouragement and the acceptance we experienced.

After 7 miles of pushing I turned the stroller over to Ryan. I think the stroller gave him momentum as he seemed to gain speed. I began feeling the race as I struggled to keep up with Ryan's pace. I offered up with greater intensity my gratitude to God for making this possible and the people that contributed and prayers for others. More and more racers passed as we tried to blend into the crowd. We rolled past crowds of supporters and cheerleaders into Camp Pendelton. Brendon kept up the "Good Jobs" with increased frequency. Ryan did a great job of allowing me opportunities to catch up. He and Brendon kept me in their sight and would stop to allow me to catch up as they knew finishing together was important to me. I think they both, especially Brendon wanted to speed up but I was grateful they kept me in their sights.

Finally the boardwalk, which would quickly lead to the finish line, came into view. Ryan began counting down the blocks (I'm not sure this was helping or hurting, it all seemed so far to me). For 13 blocks my boys offered encouragement, "GO MOMMY, YOU CAN DO IT MOMMY" spurred me on. Two blocks left and I reached for Brendon's hand as Ryan pushed on. I gathered the energy to sprint to the finish. Then STOP, WE DID IT! (I was impressed with Ryan's ability to come to a sudden stop with the stroller and he didn't run anyone over) We finished a distance of 13.1 miles in a very ordinary way, with a medal placed around Brendon's neck.

What next? I'm already planning our next event. Thank you to all who have shared in this journey with us and for your finances, prayers and continued supported.

"I will run with perseverance the race that is set before me."

Meeting a Challenge

Nine years ago I had my youngest son. He was born with Muscular Dystrophy a genetic disability. I strived to live as ordinary a life as we could despite numerous doctor appointments, therapists, educators, adaptive equipment, feeding equipment, and other inconveniences. At the time I was adjusting to our new circumstance I was mother to two other children, (one who was later diagnosed with ADHD and with all the energy that Brendon didn't have) and a new city and husband with a new high demanding job. I struggled for many years with being the mom I wanted to be and meeting the needs of my family. Even though I was a former teacher and had a degree in special education, I was in no way prepared for the emotional roller coaster I was riding. One thing that I always enjoyed was running. I completed two three marathons prior to Brendon's birth, one in which I was unknowingly pregnant with Brendon. Following Brendon's birth I continued to run to maintain my sanity. I found that I could release my fears and frustrations as my body pushed to run faster, harder, and through pain. I was able to release some of the emotional pain through vigerous running. I completed another marathon and 1/2 marathon following Brendon's birth. Then life got busy, we moved again, more medical appointments, proceedures, therapy, numerous school meetings, etc. and my running dropped off. I simply didn't have time. I started suffering physical and emotional illness. After almost three years of enduring my own hosiptalizations and medical proceedures, I decided to take controlof my health and sanity again. I began running again this year and completed the courtry music 1/2 marathon mainly because my oldest son who was going off to college at the end of the year suggested it. I was able to connect with him through running. I began to think, maybe this would be something I could share with my three boys. My middle son who had ADHD completed a 5 K with me. I saw a friend of mine Tommy McAuley start a foundation similiar to TEAMHOYT and saw him completing local 5k and 10k races. Brendon began asking me if he could run with me. This got me thinking about how I could connect with him as I was able to connect with Ryan, my oldest and Andrew my middle son. Why not! We began asking questions and found Kathy at Team HOyt very helpful with infomation and contacts and Team McAuley with equipment suggestions. We even discovered Team Rocket that had some great training and race suggestions and tips for running pushing strollers and wheelchairs. I am forever greatful to those that have come before me for inspiring me to think, WHY NOT US! We began training and I stared a blog, we raised money for Muscular Dystrophy which coincidently airs it's Jerry Lewis Telethon on Labor Day. This race will represent the endless possibilities, the acceptnce of the community, the joy of completion of a goal, and the return of mom to sanity. This process even begun a new career path for me in which I will share my writings with others and develop workshops and speaking engagements to encourage others to celeberate the joy in their life and explore all the possiblities. It is so much more than a race for me and my family. It is about acceptance of limitations, accomplishment despite those limitations, community awareness, finding your joy and overcoming fears! I would like to offer a work of gratitude for all who have shared in our journey. If you ask Brendon what this race is about, he'll tell you, "It's all about the medal"! Blessings to all running, and have a blast, I know we will!

Relationship

God desires relationship with his children. This is what being a mother has been all about. I am very aware with my oldest son having left for college recently the importance of relationship, because when your children are grown, no matter what path they choose to walk, a mom wants a relationship with them. She wants the assurance that they will continue to be in her life, they will choose this because the relationship has been important to them. Running has given me the opportunity and time to reflect on the relationship I have with my children. I am aware that I made many mistakes with my oldest, mistakes resulting from inexperience and lack of confidence in my own abilities. Many of my errors resulted from a very bumpy relationship with my God. Thankfully God provided a path for making an amends, for learning, for developing into the mom he meant me to be. This is an ongoing process open to all who seek to do God's will. I am so grateful that I have been allowed to make mistakes, that I would never be perfect but I would be ok and my children would be ok as long as I sought to do the will of God. Running has provided me the opportunity to connect with all three of my boys. It has given us a shared experience, to work to achieve a goal, to develop a relationship. Tomorrow Brendon and I will set out on our final training run before the marathon with Andrew riding his bike alongside of us. Ryan is now on his own independent path to complete his training since he has officially left for college. We will come together in one week and one day to share another journey, achieve another goal, and strengthen our relationship.

"I will run with persistance the race that is set before me."

Blessings,
Michele

Perfect Running Conditions

Today was a perfect weather running day. It was a cool 63 degrees at 6:20 this morning. The sky was bright and clear. I set out for my longest training run, 12 miles. I decided to seek out the paths in my neighborhood I had never ran before. In Sherwood Forest subdivision I picked up a dog. He stayed with me throughout the next 6 miles. Who would have though in the suvdivision there would be roosters. This is one of the things I love doing, hearing different sounds, seeing different sights. There were several steep hills on the first half of my run. The dog continued on trailing me into the next subdivision. I was heading to highway 258 and I was wondering what to do with the dog. There was no way he was going to be safe on that road. Luckily he had a tag on and I called his owner to come get his dog. Back to solo running. I decided to head down a road next to Hunter Middle School I had never gone on before. It turned out to be the best road I've run on yet in Hendersonville. It was about a mile and a half in, flat, shaded, narrow, and not a car in sight. I ran past cows, I love running past cows, they always stop to see what you're doing and follow you with your eyes. I had a brief conversation with them and on I ran. I headed to Beech High School, ran around there for awhile, enjoying watching people getting ready to head to Long Hollow Church for morning worship.

Running is medative for me.I was able to reflect on a presentation I will be doing at a local church. I reflected on the words "differently abled". We tend to think of this term in a negative manner, what a person doesn't have that we perceive they should. Then I started to think about my oldest son Ryan, who will be heading off to college in three short days. I thought of his ability to wrestle, an emotionally difficult and often draining sport. He was also giften in the abilty to play football, aren't these things that make him different from most people, in other words "differently abled"? I certainly wouldn't be able to twist my body and someone elses in the manner necessary to wrestle, and I definitely couldn't take the hits common in football. These things distinguish Ryan from most, they are his differently abled abilities. We all have them, they are Gods gifts to us that make us one of a kind. Discover your abilities, the things that make you stand out, make you different, enjoy them and be grateful for what they bring to your lives.

Happy running, dare to be different!

M

UP HILL RUN

Straight up hill. Brendon and I tackled for the first time in his stroller the Longview Hill. It was the 12:00, very warm but thankfully a breeze. I can only explain it as God energy. After several warm up hills we headed for the big one. Straight up! PUSHING, PUSHING, SWEATING... But we made it! I wasn't prepared for the downhill which was even harder. With the momentum of the stroller I struggled to keep the pace slow and even. I kept thinking if there was a way to steer this thing I'd just jump on. But we made it both up and down, and then had the flat, even, quiet run to the station camp area. Brendon was an excellent training partner though I forgot the sunscreen and he complained about his legs being hot. The stroller rolled well and was easy to push. We ended up running a little under 10 miles, in a little less than 2 hours. Have a blessed week, until next time...

Rain Running

Yesterday was a 5 mile run. I was going to run from my house, early. It was very humid and the clouds were getting darker. I was glad I didn't check the weather before I left or I would have missed the opportunity to run in the rain. This is something I hadn't done in awhile and it always makes me feel like a kid. After about a mile it began to slowly drizzle, there was a slight breeze and the air was humid. The rain came down harder. More running with the rain dripping down my head, glad I had on a cap. A few more minutes and my clothes, shoes and socks were soaked. This is fun! To run in the elements really is exhilarating. Remember when you were a kid and jumping in the puddles was so much fun, the wetter the better? That's what it felt like and noone would think I was silly because I was exercising anyway.

There was ne problem, I had on my favorite running shorts, the ones I've had for years. The problem with these shorts is they are a little big and as they got wetter and wetter they began to slip from my hips. What to do.......... I battled my shorts a few more steps. I actually considered taking them off because I couldn't keep them on, they kept slipping farther and farther. I had on boy short underwear, you know just like the gals on the Olympic track team, no big deal right? This thought kept me occupied a few more minutes. The pros, the cons, the neighbors. What to do, body isn't quite that of an Olympic athlete so somehow I've got to keep the shorts ON MY HIPS! Finally a solution, roll the shorts up, and tuck them into the elastic of my underwear. My shirt was long and covered the top of my shorts. Rain running,nothing like it and with the extra challenge of keeping my shorts on the time flew by. Run, train, have fun, get really wet, jump in the puddles, just remember don't wear shorts that are too big in the rain.

One month until the Labor Day 1/2 marathon!

Special Moms

This weekend I had the opportunity to spend four days with some other moms from my special moms group. This is a group of ladies who all have children with special needs. These women have inspired me with their stories. Isn't that what God wants us to do, share our stories? We were able to laugh, talk, laugh some more and even get a little teary eyed! IT WAS GREAT! Everyone needs friends like these.

Thank you to my friends for what you gave to me to lift my spirit and nourish my soul! In sharing your stories I know that I am not alone:
Thank you D. for providing the home, for sharing your challenge in getting your hubby to take care of himself. I can so relate.
To C. for reminding me to not forget to be a woman and that being married can be fun. I have met a new friend.
To J. for your openness in saying, I LOVE YOU, words we often feel but rarely say outside our family
To H. for your spiritual insight, for reminding me to give without expectation and to pay attention to that God voice.

You are all amazing, beautiful and strong women, I am grateful to have you in my life!

I was also able to run this weekend, 8 miles in the state park. I saw raccoons, a whole line of them munching with very little concern for me. It was quiet and beautiful. The run itself was a little tougher than usual because I forgot to eat. After 40 minutes I was beginning to struggle with the thought, Why am I doing this! But much like life, I kept on running knowing that it would eventually be over and I would feel great. Which I did. Keep on going, life gets better, and the rewards are great.

I read this from Richard Rohr: If you can't run, like my Brendon can't find something else, honor your body.
St. Paul says in his analogy of the body, "if one part is hurt, all parts are hurt with it. If one part is given special honor, all parts enjoy it…[and] it is precisely the parts of the body that seem to be the weakest which are the indispensable ones, and it is the least honorable parts of the body that we clothe with the greatest care" (I Corinthians 12:26, 22-23).

Blessings,
M

Blind Running

Today was my long run. I wasn't sure when this week I would be able to get in the 8 mile long run that was part of my training this week. And putting it on my calendar in advance for some reason leads me to dread the day. Today was a relaxed Sunday, with no agenda, a perfect time to run. The sky was cloudy and the temperatures were in the low 80's, a little humid but thankfully cloud cover.

I have been wanting to run the big hill off Long Hollow, straight up, but have always found an excuse to not run it. Today was the day. Straight up I went, it was long. I used the distance to run with my eyes closed, something I will do on a hill that is really hard. I put myself in the place of a person with blindness. How is the world different from that point of view? I close my eyes, thinking of Gavin, my friends son who has blindness as a result of prematurity. I thought of the person this year who completed the Country Music Marathon. How did they do it? I tried to pay attention to the sounds. It was quiet. And I became aware. I could only close my eyes a few minutes before I'd had to see what was going on. I would test myself trying to run a little longer with my eyes closed. On one of my blind trials I began veering off the road, opening my eyes just before I ran off the road. All you runners out there, try it, view the world from a different perspective. Appreciate the great gift our eyes are and the utter awe of those without their sight and how God allows them to view the world.

The rest of the run was peaceful. I love runs like the one I did today. It was quiet, with sights to see, hay bales, a family of quail, the stream that is very low right now, a few cars, a smashed turtle, and frog in the road, some buzzards. I was comfortable.

"I will run with perseverance the race that is set before me"

Blessings for a peaceful day,

Michele

July 4 5K

Happy July 4th to everyone. Nine years ago, today I was beginning a journey I would never have chosen but now would never change. today is Brendon's 9th birthday. We celebrated by doing our first 5K race. The weather was humid but cool and cloudy, with a light drizzle at the start that ended shortly after we crossed the start line. Andrew, Ryan and I started out pushing Brendon. The course was hilly but not steep. It was a little crowded at the start, even though we were at the end of the pack. Negotiating and trying not to run anyone over with the stroller was a challenge and Ryan and I were trying to figure out how to run together with Brendon. My goal was to get to two miles and have Ryan take over toward the finish. I made it... almost. Heading up a hill around mile two, I was feeling tired. I wasn't getting into a smooth rhythm. My breathing was heavy, I ws sweating and was worried about running someone over. I noticed I was going to have to be patient. We would get behind a person or group of people and couldn't just whip around them. So we followed, watched and waited for an opportunity to pass. Another opportunity to practice patience. I was prepared for this to happen but it didn't make things easier. I think the mental energy was making me physically tired. I've never been very good at patience. So right before mile two I ad Ryan take over with little effort he pushed Brendon. I struggled to keep up. Ryan and Brendon were ready to take off. Mom was hanging back, saying,"slow down!" "Come on mom, let's go, mom's slow, are you ready mom?" These were the questions fired off from Brendon and Ryan. But they were smiling , enjoying the energy of youth and making fun with their old mom.

The finish line was quickly approaching. "Are you ready mom...ok, let's go", and away we went. "I am focusing my eyes on the prize that is set before me." was the only thing I could think of. At the finish the cameras awaited as Fox 17 news was doing a story on us. All I could think of was, "I can't pass out here with the cameras rolling, gotta make it look good, don't make such a scrunchy pained face for the camera!" And across we ran in 29:24. YEA!

Relief and gratitude and a sense of accomplishment, under 30 minutes, pushing a stroller, I was surprised at my own ability. I couldn't have done it without the encouragement of my boys. I was so grateful to Ryan, he slowed down to allow us all to finish, he could have zoomed past me! I'm proud of Andrew who finished a little behind us. We are now a running family. Hot, sweaty, but newly energized, we met Scott Couch with Fox 17 for our interview. I was able to be somewhat articulate though I can only imagine what I looked like! I probably should have hid behind the stroller. We'll see, the interview airs tonight on Fox 17 news at 9:00.

Blessings, and thanks for being a part of our story.

Perseverance

Gosh sometimes the my limitations in handling frustrations are so present. Ten minutes into the posting of this blog, because I forgot my password I was ready to say forget it, it's not worth it. But I persevered and here I am.

Great news, Rachel and I talked (she and their husband have started a non profit organization called Team Mcally). Because of my purchase of the running stroller Advanced Medical will be donating two strollers to their organization. Yea.

Update on the stroller, they delivered the wrong one, and are to pick it up. It was scheduled to be picked up yesterday! Guess what, it's still sitting on my porch! I hate ordering by mail, especially when it's something large like this. Almost without fail, I end up with a problem to solve. Another opportunity to persevere!

Perseverance has been the gift taking action to bring to the awareness the needs of children with special needs. Through the perseverance of training for the marathon I am putting my story out there. My son is a visible reminder of all that is possible if we just persevere. The strength comes is we have the courage to trust.

For all my friends and family, Fox 17 locally will be doing a feature story on Brendon as we will be doing our first training run this July 4 in Hendersonville at Drakes Creek park. So all you local friends I will let you know when it is aired. Wouldn't it be great if it got picked up nationally? Let's keep our fingers crossed. I am working to make a contact in Virginia. Anyone know anyone?

"So run with perseverance the race that is set before you!"

Minor Annoyance

Life is filled with minor annoyances. Little things that happen on a daily basis that make our life inconvenient, frustrating and downright stressful. How we choose to handle these events determines our peace of mind in any given moment. Today was one of those days. The running stroller finally arrived, a week ago. It has been sitting in our garage for a week because I was relying on my husband to put it together. As it came in a little box, I anticipated hundreds of pieces with complex directions and frankly was not up to it so I asked my husband to handle it. Today, he had the time and put it together. Into the bedroom he came, while I was relaxing and reading to let me know it did not look like the stroller that I had borrowed from Tommy. Upon investigation, it is the wrong stroller. GREAT!! Just GREAT! (and a few other words) Back to the receipt, and return policy on the Internet, phone call, e-mail and wait until Monday to see what the outcome is. I'm just not sure if the error is mine (which I have automatically assumed, and the error I've already figured out will cost me $200.00) or the error was on the part of the company. Why am I jumping to conclusions without waiting for the customer service to call me back? Why am I putting myself through the worst case scenario? All I can do at this point is to wait until Monday.

These are the little events that occur as a result of living life. Compared to the big things, death, financial ruin, illness, is this really such a big deal? But these are the daily events I often choose to go crazy over!

I think I'll concentrate on paying attention to all the things that go smoothly in my life, at least until the next annoyance!

Have a blessed day, pay attention to all things that occure without incident, inconvenience or annoyance!

M



"I am running, with perseverance the race that is set before me."

Humility

I will never in my life have as much humility as Brendon. This is something that comes naturally to him, and I have to work hard at everyday! Brendon knows the humility of relying on others. When you can't dress yourself, use the restroom or even turn over in bed you know humility and the importance of relying on others. You know the importance of having others in your life to help you. You know that God didn't leave you in this world to be alone, or to figure things out for yourself. I often have thought with sadness that Brendon would never be able to run, do yoga, or anything the physically active can do. Over time I have changed my thinking. But there are things Brendon experiences that I may never know. I may never know the total dependence on others and the faith that my needs will be met through no action on my part. I will probably not be featured on a television news cast, get to fly as copilot in an airplane, have a group of Tennessee Tech students work to modify a bicycle for me, be a guest at the Shriners Circus or any of the other numberous things Brendon has been able to do because of his disability. As his mother I am challenged to figure out ways to include Brendon and this year he will get to cross the finish line of a 1/2 marathon. How many 9 year old children can accomplish this, or are even given the opportunity to do it? I have become willing to accept his disability not as a negative event in his life but an opportunity to think of things in another way. God has given me all I need to take care of him and God will continue to put people in his path that will be there for him. For this I am grateful.

" You've had more than enough teachings. You have been given everything you need in order to be free. It's time for you to go out in the world and live a happy life!" -Eat, Pray, Love p. 313

M

Thank You Team Hoyt

I would like to thank first Tommy Mcauley (at T.E.A.M Mcauley, check out their non profit) for the use of your stroller, for being at local races and showing me what is possible for a running mom, and for inspiring me to take my own physical journey with Brendon. Thank you for also connecting me to TEAM Hoyt http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cS596VsNEOE, this is a father son who raced with his son in the 60's, an unheard of feat at the time. I think you will be moved by this short video. Thank you all parents who have come before me to make the road a little easier for Brendon and I. And thank you for all the parents taking wondrous journeys and putting their children out there for all to enjoy.

Brendon is going to be a celebrity again, many of you got to see him last year at the MDA telethon Labor Day 2007. Scott Couch from Fox 17 will be doing a follow up story on Brendon for the 2008 telethon on our new journey to finish the Virginia Beach Marathon. More detail to come.

June 5, 2008: Orange Beach, AL First Training Day

June 5, 2008

Today was the first day to run with Brendon. We are in Orange Beach, AL. It bagan with the frustration of unfolding and putting together the stroller. It looked so simple when Larry and Tommy showed me. When all else fails read the directions, that didn’t help, more frustration. Just 5 seconds before the cursing ws going to take place, sanity returned and a quick “help me” prayer was sent up to whatever power available. It worked, levers were fastened, poles in place, locked and loaded we set out. I had already scoaped out the route, pretty straight and with a side walk. It was exactly 8:30 am, Brendon was the timekeeper. Note to self, get a good training watch. A cell phone will work in a pinch, sunglasses, water, Chap Stick, wash cloth (to absorb the sweat), ball cap and room key, we set out. HOT, we should have set out earlier, partly cloudy, sun strong, light breeze and 78 degrees, humid! 10 minutes, sweat dripping, thank you for the wash cloth, essential for keeping sweat out of the eyes. 15 minutes in, bathroom break, at this pace we’ll never finish> Now we’re ready! Prayers, are continual companion, we’re on our way. Finally a rhythm and pace is set. With Brendon keeping track of the time we’re on our way. I keep my mind clear by constant prayer; the rosary works great for this. Brendon hums and makes up songs. Brendon tries to tell me something. “What?”, I respond. I can’t make out what he is saying. “Talk LOUDER,” after several exchanges like this I hear what he is saying. He comments, “When you’re breathing hard, does it help if I sing songs?” Absolutely, joy I feel and all the sweat, heat and fatigue disappears with this simple exchange.

48 minutes later, we’re done. Short cool down walk, Brendon begins to complain, the hat, and the shoulder harness is bothering him. Because his neck is so stiff, he sometimes gets uncomfortable. Be grateful for a neck that moves from side to side. I have to solve this problem before the race.

We made it, now coffee, sit down, put on swim suit and head to the pool!

M.

“I am fighting the good fight, I am running a strong race, I am keeping the faith”

Written June 4, 2008

June 4, 2008

Everyone should have the opportunity to set and achieve goals, family members of those with disabilities are no different. On Labor Day, 2008 Brendon, his older brother Ryan and I will set out to complete the Virginia Beach ½ marathon. Brendon’s two brothers have been blessed with bodies that can endure the vigorous demands of physical exercise and sports. Both participate in football, wrestling and a variety of other physical challenges. Brendon is being given the opportunity to finish a race, his physical body cannot complete with out help. Ryan and I will be his legs, he will be our motivation, our heart.

I have completed the initial steps, to get in shape, get permission and make arrangements with the race directors and have even been able to raise the $785.00 cost of the stroller. On with the training.

About Running Mom's Brendon:

Pregnancy was uneventful. I felt good, had energy and got good reports on my regular check ups, and at 7 lbs ½ oz., a little smaller that the 8 lbs 2 oz and 9 lbs 11 oz of my other boys, we were unconcerned. However, there were a few unusual circumstances that made Brendon’s birth different from that of his brothers Ryan (now 18) and Andrew (now 12). He had early apgars of 6 and later 8, but he had a dislocated left hip and right knee. On day two the orthopedist showed up to cast his right knee. It was bigger than he was, and a little imposing, and I was to discover this was going to draw attention and questions which required explanations from family, friends and total strangers. He wore a hip harness for the first 6 months of his life. This was just the first of many visual differences and equipment which would draw curious looks and attention and become an everyday part of Brendon’s anatomy. Anonymous, Brendon was not going to be.

As I describe our current journey toward another new finish line, I cannot help to reflect on other paths explored, hopefully I will be able to do this in a way that makes sense to the reader.

This will be Brendon’s first ½ marathon, a distance of 13.1 miles. However, in pregnancy Brendon bounced inside me while I completed the Honolulu marathon in December of 1998, a distance of 26.2 miles. Little did I know during my training, following a 20 mile distance run that I was pregnant. I remember a cold, chilling November training run. I decided to go to the doctor because I had at the time a cold which did not seem to be going away. My menstrual cycle was halted, but this is not unusual in any strenuous training program. The doctor decided to do a pregnancy test just in case. When she came back into the room and informed me I was pregnant, I said there was no way. We bantered back and forth before the realization sunk in. I headed to my OBGYN to discuss my condition and get reassurance that the training had’t inflicted any harm on the developing fetus. I asked if I was going to be unable to run the marathon. He assured me that he was unconcerned, though he wouldn’t advise any new mother beginning this type of training. Since I was already in shape and the baby was used to the training, there would be no harm in continuing. He cautioned me to be sure to take it easy, not going for any records, rest if needed, hydrate and pay attention to nutrition. I took his advice, finishing the race in less than 6 hours, it took forever. I stopped at the aid stations to get my vitals checked, drank lots of water, digested protein and took advantage of every port a potty along the way, onward we went. Just for the curious, in no way did the distance racing contribute to Brendon’s disability. Muscular Dystrophy is a genetic condition and is no way caused by any pregnancy factors.

As in any long distance race, I have stopped to rest, paid attention to the needs of my physical body, gotten filled up, emptied out, slowed down to prevent running out of energy, paid attention to injury prevention and sped up to keep up with the crowd and ventured off the path, often being dragged back on course, sometimes willingly and many times not. But I have endured. I have grown in physical strength, emotional stability, mental capacity but most noticeable in spiritual dimension. I continually reference my higher power, whom I chose to call God. I hope to encourage and instill a desire to persevere despite challenges toward a deeper joy. Persevere with faith, humility and love. Mostly I hope to inspire you to find your joy, your passion, the thing you seek with the power you need. Ambitious, RIGHT! Possible, ABSOLUTELY!!! Please comment, offer suggestions, celebrate and share your story with me. Follow me, run beside me and forge ahead of me to achieve your own desires, reach your own goals and endure all this life has to offer. Blessings for joy!

M


“I am fighting the good fight, I am running a strong race, I am keeping the faith”

Let me first dispense with the general facts about me. I am middle age, have been married for 20 years and have three sons, Ryan 18, Andrew 12 and Brendon soon to be 9. I have been through, like anyone else my age many ups and downs, twists and turns in the journey we call life. This blog will speak to my journey toward acceptance and joy through the challenges of raising a child with a disability, being a mother of three sons and being married 20 years.
Brendon my youngest son has muscular dystrophy, a genetic condition present at birth that doesn't allow his muscles to keep up with the growing demands of his body. He travels by a power driven wheelchair, attends a regular elementary school with an assistant, and enjoys being active. He is healthy, filled with joy and courageous with an unending supply of patience. He is the happiest, most content person I have ever known. He is a continual source of amazement for me and all who know him.


I have set out to achieve an adventurous goal: TO RUN THE VIRGINIA BEACH 1/2 MARATHON WITH MY 18 YEAR OLD SON AND MY 9 YEAR OLD SON WHO HAS MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY, with my husband and 12 year old cheering us on. Ambitious, maybe, crazy a little but it can be done and has been done by others. I want to cronicle our progress toward the marathon finish line and beyond. Join me and share your experience and inspiration with us on this journey!